Association of Bangalore Coaches
February 19
Join Steve Correa 630 PM on 21 February Thursday at Christ University. Come strike or no strike, ABC goes on, free with tea! cheers ram
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Steve briefly outlined the key differences between Coaching
with Consulting, Counseling, and Mentoring.
He argued that the way we think, feel and act creates our
reality and the experience of it. That all of us carry a ‘map’ inside, that is
shaped also by how we want to be seen by society. Essentially then, we each
become what we have ourselves designed – we deserve what we get.
Steve emphasized that the first step is to realize this. To
become aware of our thoughts, feelings and behavior at all times. All change
begins with this. You need to know, ‘what you don’t know you don’t know’. It is
only then can one move to Right action.
He then went on to explain the Coaching Philosophy and stated as under:
The client owns the problem, the
outcomes, the current reality, the data on the current reality, the pieces of
the current jigsaw - it is for him / her to intervene and make the
self-disclosure. It is for him to own the insight, and to open up the
possibilities of options, to weigh each of the options and select, the path
ahead to the desired outcome. Also, to set a roadmap and milestone for the way.
The role of the Coach is the mirror.
Steve pointed out that in order
to widen the perspective, the client must examine several systems – the
interpersonal, the intra-personal, intra psychic and also intra existential.
Through deeper and wider personal enquiry (aka reflection), the client begins
to get a deeper understanding around Who am I? What am I? How come I think,
feel and act this way? This introspection allows the client to review the
multiple identities he has ‘acted’ from, and the multiple ‘roles’ he has played
and continues to play. By and by he comes to realize, that many roles were
played with ‘handed down rules, diktats and belief systems’. In this process
the client learns to examine his own belief systems, his own hidden
assumptions, and his preferences to act and think in a particular way.
Steve argues that, in every event
(location) it offers choices to act, within the role. Given these choices, how
do we act? Do we relate with Spontaneous awareness or with compulsivity, and
wherein is this source? Steve comments that over the years the Self (the atman)
takes on various identities, multiple personas, that form our personality.
Steve argues that our personality is constructed – it is not our true nature.
Right action he argues springs from being located at one’s core, not displaced
to the left or the right (the extremes). Here there is an awakened response,
and freedom from diktat of the ‘role’.
The ego comes from the ‘identity’
wishing to perpetuate itself – it is the shadow of the self. The ego is the
property of the mind. Unless we ‘lighten up’ the shadow, it will not fall away.
Acceptance of one’s nature (self) and acting from one’s location is freedom and
responsibility. To ‘expect’ from a role, either ourselves or from others is to
eventually be disappointed. ‘Accept, not Expect’ he argued.
The coaching process is to help
client articulate the inarticulate, act the withheld, own the disowned, and to
make that which was invisible, visible. Truly then, the role of assessment
tools and diagnostics is not to get an understanding of what is. For what is,
is what is not. The tools are ‘devices’ to support crucial conversations that
offer an understanding around the way we think, feel and act. By itself there
are ‘chess boards’ – either just wooden pieces to some, or a complete action
dynamic for someone else. It is awareness that makes it one or the other.
Using diagnosis tools, or
Assessment tools then could be either an invitation to explore one’s personal
interiority and the relationships with others and society. Used as an
indictment, to label someone, ‘this is you’ would be a violation. At the core,
the tool is for the use of the client, and not for the coach or worse the
organization to make ‘decisions’.
Steve went on to share personal
experiences of several tools that he has been using, and familiar with – self
assessment, 360 feedback, psychometric tools, Getalt, NLP, etc. He tasked about
tests to check multiple proficiencies, etc, also to gauge multiple
intelligence, etc. The participants in the programme also shared their
experiences in using some of these tools. Steve also spoke about leading
service providers, SHL ( he is an SHL assessor), SHRM and NTL as a few examples
of what they do.
Steve pointed out that the list
of tools and assessment go up each day, with dozens being added. He cautioned
again, that the tools were mere devices – the whole purpose is to lead to the
‘jump site’ – it is the fall that does it, not the device. Either a climb up 88
steps, or a move to the cliff – it is the fall that does it, the clients’ own
surrender – the plunge. His own commitment to growth. The role of the coach is
to hold the space, to be the calm in the storm. The coach and the client become
one. The musician and the instrument disappear, just the music remains, the
dancer disappear, only the dance remains. It is only when client experiences
the ‘ah ah’ moment that truth is experienced and deep insight follows.
Several questions and reflections
were made during the talk and post it. Someone asked, how important is one tool
to another, how does one choose? Steve shared that each tool lends itself more
readily to a context, but that’s not the point. He argues that any tool would
do eventually. For when the learner is ready, the learning begins, when the
student is ready, the master arrives. Steve added that of all tools, meditation
was to him, the best.
Someone asked about Silence and
the role it played. Silence and Deep listening he argued were the two key
competencies of Coaching, he argued.
Several Coaches who were present
(D.Harish, Dhruva Sen) also shared their reflections on the talk. They were
some very young audiences – students who asked a few questions.
